Should You Get Them a Pet?
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Having and taking care of pets is one of the most rewarding ways to help children develop internally and includes many different pathways to self–development, social skills, health, family bonding, and many more precious gems! Worried about the costs? There are lots of animal rescue groups and veterinarian hospitals who help lonely pets find good homes for free, and often provide vaccinations and, er, birth control. Afraid of working long hours and not being able to properly care for it? That’s what kids are for! Besides, many families in China have small pets and work crazy hours, yet still find a way to walk out the door after a stressful day at the office and just chill with something furry while in sweats. If you are really adventurous, it’s a great excuse to wear pajamas in public. I recommend it.
Worried about having too small of an apartment? There’s lots of smaller dogs and cats, of course, that can be perfectly happy even in a small place. Having the chance daily to go out and meet all the other animals along the wild and nuanced zone of fragrance and treasure of Beijing streets has got to be a dog’s paradise. Even some of our more adventurous humans can have a whale of a time trying to figure out what exactly some of those mysterious items in the gutter are. It’s free entertainment. Or at least free… something. If you still have doubts about being able to handle a family pet, I have some great reasons to give it a try, and they all relate to the amazing benefits a pet will bring to your family. Here they are:
Play
Playing with pets is a very important part of the process. Young children, at first, may only want to play with their pet. In the beginning, the pet serves the role of a toy which the child directs in their play to serve their own interests. However, since pets also have their own needs and wishes, they provide immediate feedback to the play. The child must learn to respond to the feedback the pet is giving, to understand when their play is too rough or when the pet does not like it. They also get positive feedback in the form of cuddling, purring or care-seeking behaviors.
This kind of feedback is helpful for developing children’s emotional regulation, bonding, and relationship building. It becomes more of a give and take, rather than a one-dimensional fantasy. Because of the nature of these kinds of relationships, pets can be very good emotional support for children who experience loneliness, social awkwardness, or insecurity. The unconditional love of a dear pet is a great emotional boost while teaching appropriate behaviors at the same time.
Nurturing
Not only can a pet provide a child with emotional support and care, but children also learn these skills in return. Especially for boys, who might not feel safe playing “parent” to toys or even siblings, having a pet gives them the social leeway to care for an animal in ways similar to “playing daddy”. It’s still masculine, it’s still cool, and it’s something that boys really need permission to explore if we want them to be emotionally responsive kids today and healthy parents later in life. Often children will talk to their pets and reveal secret feelings and stories to their pet as a trusted friend. Additionally, children who can read aloud to pets engage in read-alouds more comfortably and often than those who do not have pets.
Health Benefits
Pets offer great health benefits to children and families. Children in households with pets have fewer allergies and cases of asthma, fewer visits to the doctor’s office and they are likely to have lower blood pressure. Actually, studies show that people who play with their dogs have lower blood pressure. Owning pets that need to be walked encourages exercise and helps children who are slow to get moving or struggling with their weight or other health issues. Pets reduce stress, anxiety, and loneliness, which are all things that expat families in China may be dealing with.
Responsibility
Depending on the age of the child and the type of pet being cared for, the responsibilities of caring for an animal can be gradually introduced and transferred to children. For children younger than ten, it’s a wise idea to assist the child in learning care – obviously the easiest and most enjoyable activities first. However, children can take on more and more duties as they grow in their maturity and become more aware of the many skills and activities it takes to care for another living being. Simple tasks to begin with can be feeding and watering, going for walks, and brushing or washing the pet.
These responsibilities can increase to include taking care of waste, clipping nails, tooth care, and assisting with giving medications or supplements, cleaning living areas. These kinds of responsibilities assist a child in not only learning what is involved in caring for another, but the need to be consistent and regular with care. Not only will these skills help them to have other pets in the future, but it also encourages good self-care in the now. This is great for kids who struggle with brushing their hair or completing regular self-care tasks.
Family Bonding
Children are rarely solely responsible for pets, and it’s often the parents or older siblings who take a good chunk of the responsibility on. However, even without the joint responsibility of care, pets provide an easy point of interest for family members to connect around. Especially in the very tech-heavy times we are living in, it seems families need to work harder to find common interests and themes. People are often tied up in corners of the house using some kind of device, and getting off those devices to have a face to face conversation can be challenging. Let those among us who have not sent a WeChat message to our child sitting in the next room or next chair stand and be counted! Noticing funny quirks about a family pet, playing with them, or just enjoying their company together creates family bonding time that is surely worth more than its weight than umm… pet waste.
Respect for Life
Children who raise animals develop respect, love and curiosity about the living world and about nature. Their feelings and emotional connection towards their pet will naturally extend out to caring for other domestic and wild animals, and nature in general. And finally, they will at some point be faced with death and loss. All things must come to an end, and this includes a dear animal friend. Exploring and moving through the tough emotions of losing a pet helps children to understand the transient nature of life, that all things must eventually die, and that it’s okay. We have the opportunity to cherish each moment with those we love around us, knowing that these things are finite. Dealing with pet loss will help children be able to deal emotionally with other loss later in life.
With all of these amazing benefits available, it’s a wonder that any of us are without animals. So if you are ready to take the plunge, be assured there are many resources out there for finding caring for, and raising pets in Beijing. And rejoice in the new perspectives that those fascinating smells and mysterious objects on the streets of life have to offer when accompanied by a furry friend!
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This article appeared in the beijingkids October 2019 Best Friends Fur-ever issue.